| How To Treat Unruly Children In A Library
I've had a lot of kids running around this place whose parents simply don't know how to control them; screaming, messing with the stock, tryign to escape, being a complete pain in the ass for everyone concerned. I don't know if the parents are incapable of reigning in their errant spawn, or just unwilling. It's a nightmare.
However, I've just seen a grandmother do it perfectly.
The moment her child was about to cause a fuss over not getting a toy he wanted from the toy library, she said with a firm voice "No, we don't do any of that," gathered him up and simply carried him away. He shut up rather quickly when he realised his caterwaling wouldn't actually get him anywhere. He made one last half-hearted attempt to get at it, which ceased immediatey when the attentive grandmother told him, firmly, "No."
It's that simple, people. Just pay attention to your kids, and actually instill some respect into them. When you say no, you mean no. You don't plead. You don't beg. You don't give in. You just say no. And if you start early enough, they learn quickly that no really does mean no - and they'll only debate that in the most (relatively) important circumstances.
Perpetual Snake Oil
Why is anyone fooled by the idea of a company in Ireland producing the world's first perpetual motion machine?
It's laughable. There's no evidence and no science. The only demonstration that was scheduled apparently fell through because of the heat of the lights for the cameras. I don't know why they persist, is it some kind of marketing stunt for Red Bull or something?
The funniest thing about all this is that the Intelligent Design lobby have declared their support for this device, claiming that because it breaks the laws of thermodynamics, that mainstream science is proven wrong, and that apparently supports their own theories.
Laugh? I almost cried.
We've all heard the old straw man argument. You walk through a forest and everything is green and natural; then you come to a watch, which is so complex that it has to be created by something else. A straw man, for sure, because it's been theorised (and somewhat proven) that if clocks were biological and acted like biological systems in their development - and if their preferential traits in natural selection were to tell accurate time - then actually, it would take a surprisingly small number of generations to go from single cog to multi-pendulum multi-hand clocks that are accurate within a hundredth of a second and tell seconds, minutes and hours. So riddle me this. You walk through a forest and everything is green and natural; then you come across a perpetual motion machine that doesn't work, which is essentially more useless than a rock.
OH LAWDY! I'M BORN AGAIN!
It's Not Natural?
Speaking of the entire religious angle. Does anyone remember when the common argument against homosexuality was "It's Not Natural"?
Ever noticed the prevalence of homosexual behaviour in the animal kingdom? And how it is in almost every circumstance an instinctive mental switchover during times of overpopulation, like locusts rubbing their legs together accidentally? (I believe the only exception is the Bonobo Ape that does it for social bonding reasons.)
Ever noticed how the human race is vastly overpopulated?
Think about it for a moment. | comments: Leave a comment   |
| Don't get me wrong. You stick with your vinyl, that's cool. That's not a problem by me at all. More power to you, dude.
But I've just listened to a ten-minute...grumble...about how music used to be "collectible" and there used to be a "story" behind it and now music is far more "disposable". Unsaid words: Because of MP3s. More unsaid words: Because you youngins don't respect nuffin.
Is that REALLY what music is about? Being collectible? Being a material item? If I paid for the material cost of a CD - plastics, production costs, printing - it would come up to pennies, I doubt even double figures in that regard, probably far less. Given economies of scale of course. So why will I very rarely be able to buy a CD with a ten pound note?
The MUSIC. It's not about what the music is on, or how you listen to it - it's about what you are listening to. The CONTENT, not the container. Now speaking as a writer (and I don't know if this is comparable but wtfever), if you are more interested in the pages my book is printed on than the words that I have written, I'm going to be irked. It's like a child opening a christmas present, throwing away the Furby and spending an hour playing with the box.
I might not have a story behind the MP3 of "Colourful" by Rocco DeLuca and the Burden. But it's very special to me, more special than any piece of plastic I own. It has a story to it. And it's part of my music COLLECTION, which isn't the bits of material I possess, it's music that I COLLECT.
And I wouldn't ever dispose of it. To think that music is disposable simply because it is digital? No. It's more accessible. You can do more with it. I fail to see how that is a bad thing. The fact that I can pipe it into my 360 and listen to it while playing Gears Of War is awesome - that I can transport it onto a plane in my breast pocket or dangling around my neck, along with twenty more hours of music, is a wonderful thing.
If anything, the MP3 revolution frees music. It removes it from the physical anchors it previously occupied. Yes, it needs physicality - a hard drive - but that is entirely secondary. It's just somewhere for the song to sit. It's the SONG that matters, and I love the fact that the song is now mine to listen to and use as I choose.
...which is why I hate DRM, but that's a rant for later. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| There's something very cathartic about being stabbed in the back sometimes.
Don't get me wrong - it's not a nice experience. It's not something to look forward to, and pity on those that have to expect it. It's a low thing to do to another human being.
But when the knife sinks in? In that moment (usually some time after the fact) that you know someone is out for your blood? There's something very refreshing about it. In that moment there's no grey - black and white, high contrast, with your allies and enemies picked out in pixel-perfect definition.
The thing is...this time, the little crew of snitches that are deciding to cause issues have picked on the wrong motherfucker. Because they've hit pushovers before. They've worked on people that will do anything to avoid a conflict, that will stop visitting their favourite place to drink in order to stay away from their agressors.
That's not me. Sorry guys. I know I'm not to your taste, but honestly - if you try and shit on me, you WILL regret it. Because I'm not the only one tired of your shit, even if a few people are blind to your scheming.
And the best thing is, you're all fucking each other over too. So this whole little fucked-up family, when it's done destroying my social group, will collapse in on itself like a star becoming a singularity.
Twats. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Dear X Factor,
Congratulations. I didn't think anyone could actually do it, but you've achieved what the entire current music industry could not. You've crushed my faith that the industry could produce something good by itself.
Oh sure; there's some quality acts around the periphery. There's some bands that become big even lacking - or perhaps despite of - your relentless marketing and the incredible ignorance of the general music-buying populace. But if we're honest, they aren't the moneymakers, are they? They're not the people that churn out the classic cash cows, like:
- Horrible, oversampled, uninspiring hip-hop with all the originality of a photocopier and no message AT ALL.
- Pop-trash songs put through a barrage of filters and machinery written by middle-aged men in offices for singers without any talent AT ALL.
- Dance music that I could make in five minutes with my laptop and a complete lack of any creativity AT ALL.
Yes. These are the things that make money. And honestly? That's fine. That's why there's an Alternative music scene. That's why the quality music will always be considered Alternative - the music that is written by the people that perform it, the music with craft and effort put into its creation, the music that is made with blood, sweat and tears. The music the artist wants to make, regardless of if it will sell.
But when the main stream decides to dip into a song that is for all purposes an Alternative song (in that it is beautiful, well-crafted and not made for a cynical marketing scheme - at odds with the main stream ENTIRELY), then a line has been crossed; Leona Lewis covering Run? That's not so offensive, despite her version being frankly rubbish, but at least she didn't butcher say Chasing Cars or The Planets Bend Between Us.
It's Hallelujah that gets to me.
Hallelujah. If you listen to that song, every time it's performed, it is a different song - I've heard countless versions, all of them performed by talented artists, all of them unique, all of them personal to that artist. The most beautiful version I've heard is performed solo by Myles Kennedy of Alter Bridge and the Mayfield Four, but I also have a lot of love for the Rufus Wainright version, and of course, Jeff Buckley.
The song could never be called a hopeful song. If you listen to it...if you listen to it AT ALL then you know it isn't a hopeful song, or a terribly happy one, or anything else. Trying to make it happy and up-beat would be a little like trying to remove the anger from Jeremy, or the cynicism from Welcome To The Machine - or trying to turn Learn To Fly into a funeral dirge. In short, it fucks up the song.
In short, YOU fucked up the song. I won't blame the woman that sung it (whoever she is). I blame YOU, X Factor. I blame the gears behind the scenes that have galvanised the industry into force-feeding us dog shit again. I blame YOU for turning a beautiful, touching song into something horrifyingly banal and "family-friendly" and all in the name of sales and the Christmas number one slot. Because in five years, when you talk to young people about Hallelujah, they will remember this over-produced pile of monkey droppings, and not a REAL version of the song.
That's okay, though. You line your pockets. You sign the record deals and the marketing agreements and make sure you can afford that brand new Lamborghini. Because we fans of music? You know, MUSIC? That stuff that you can believe in? We work behind the scenes. When someone talks about the Christmas number one, we'll introduce them to a real version of the song, and that will move them to tears - and they will regret you people ever acquiring the rights for Hallelujah.
Enjoy your money. It may not be all yours for long. Change is coming, and the industry is opening up. The dinosaurs in charge that sic the lawyers on everyone that deviates from their current listening plan can't possibly keep up with the changes in listening habits and the delivery of media. Revolution will come, regardless of how hard you'll fight.
I'll delight in watching your house of cards collapse around you.
Signed,
A Music Fan | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Group of airport expansion protestors prevent representatives from attending UN climate change conference
Plane Stupid (nice name) decided to hold a protest on Stansted Airport's runway this morning. One of the flights that couldn't leave due to their protest was one carrying people to a UN climate change conference. But that's alright! Apparently, according to the spokesperson, conferences and consultation won't actually achieve anything. Ever. So we need to stop planes flying, which will fix the environment, and prevent carbon entering the atmosphere.
Except it won't, because carbon levels follow temperature, not vice versa.
But nonetheless, this is the primary problem with angry grass-roots groups. They decide to go for big disruption without actually getting anything done, and they feel all big and clever when they see how many people they've screwed with, and then they realise all they've done is torpedoed their own cause.
| | comments: Leave a comment |
| Barack Obama.
You, sir, deserve this. You have fought a battle with honour against opponents that entirely lack it. You have fought the prejudice of the many and emerged victorious. You have brought hope not just to America but to the entire world.
Make me proud, mister President. Make me proud to have seen the moment that you were declared the winner. Make me proud to be a man that stood by your cause.
Now go out there and kick some ass. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| New year's was awesome. Got totally and utterly slayed, repeatedly, and had a generally brilliant time. All those who had no idea I was gone, I do apologise. I didn't mean to panic you. Just went off to have a good time. :-D And here's one picture of me having aforementioned good time.
Onto new business...Dad has asked me if he can use the internet from 1am onwards. And I've said yes, like the idiot I am - because as I figure, he'll pass out not long after that and I can get right back online again. Also he said I could have it from 3pm onwards, which isn't really so bad, since usually he'll take it for a variable time up to almost 4:30 or 5.
Mum has started on the "must pack stuff" drive again, which is really starting to get on my tits. Totally. It's come to be something of a cross on my back. I can't stand the thought of leaving this place, and really my only way of dealing with the fact that I'll HAVE to is trying to keep it as home for as long as possible. The day all my previous things come off my shelves is the day that I detach myself from this place, and if I have to live for a long time while detached and without somewhere else to attach to, I can't promise I'll be able to deal with it.
Don't worry though. I'll be fine. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| BAD NEWS - My old PC died.
GOOD NEWS - I am on a new one.
BAD NEWS - I have to reinstall everything.
GOOD NEWS - I kept ALL my writing AND all my MP3s.
WOOT FUCKING PATOOT! | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| A music meme swiped from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) comedy_emsy...
Step 1: Put your MP3 player on random.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 20 songs that play.
Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly.
Step 5: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!
WINAMP GO NOW
01: Borderline, dead inside, I don't mind falling to pieces (Breaking Benjamin - Unknown Soldier)
02: I've told you this once before, you can't control me (Godsmack - I Stand Alone)
03: What the fizzUUUUCK! (Optimus Rhyme - Reboot)
04: Even now, the world is bleeding (Live - Overcome)
05: I'm a soldier, znachit ya, I otvetchik i sud'ya (Yoko Kanno - Rise)
06: Son, she said, have I got a little story for you (Pearl Jam - Alive)
07: Now you can do it in your sleep, then you'll worry for a week (Embrace - Save Me)
08: Life is changing and I can't go on without you (Sevendust - Angel's Son)
09: Here I go again, through the back streets of my mind (Wet Wet Wet - Julia Says)
10: I'm in over my head (Lit - Over My Head)
11: Sie ist häßlich daß es graut, wenn sie in den Himmel schaut (Rammstein - Morgenstern)
12: Something evil's watching over you (Lion - Transformers)
13: Many's the time I ran with you down the rainy roads of our old town (Keane - Bedshaped)
14: I could be James Dean of the music scene (Daniel Beddingfield - James Dean)
15: I can't stand to fly, I'm not that naive (Five For Fighting - Superman (It's Not Easy))
16: Is everybody happy now? Is everybody clear? (Counting Crows - Up All Night (Frankie Miller Goes To Hollywood))
17: When you're on your own and the night, the night is yours alone (REM - Everybody Hurts)
18: Drove downtown in the rain, 9:30 on a Tuesday night (Barenaked Ladies - Brian Wilson)
19: Conceived in hell beyond your depth of perception (Fear Factory - Edgecrusher)
20: Bend me shape me misdirect me, it's all the same to me (Drowning Pool - Sinner)
Edit: Since nobody could guess the rest of these, I'm going to fill out the names now. ;) | | comments: 14 comments or Leave a comment |
| London. Was. AWESOME.
On the Friday we visited Sin City at the Electric Ballroom. That, my friends, was a quality club night for all involved. On Saturday we ate Japanese and watched Fearless, the last Jet Li wuxia movie - which kicked ass. And Sunday was our day of rest, meaning we spent umpteen hours slogging through Camden Market. Camden ROCKS.
Yes. :-D | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
Go here and look through random quotes until you find 5 that you think reflect who you are or what you believe.
"Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people."
Robert Benchley
"Trust one who has gone through it."
Virgil
"Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned."
Milton Friedman
"Look well into thyself; there is a source of strength which will always spring up if thou wilt always look there."
Marcus Aurelius Antonius
"The man who insists on seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides."
Henri-Frédéric Amiel
I'm not tagging anyone - you want it, you do it. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| Tagged by muppetfred
Write A Book
I want to write more than just one book. I'm WRITING a book, and this one is going to be about self-belief, finding one's own path, and stepping out of shadows - ignorance, fear, even one's own father. The next one? Who knows. It's a lot harder than it looks to write a book with a decent message.
I'm not tagging anyone else. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| Thefted from word_waterfall! YOINK
So, here's how it works. Open your music player (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, etc). Put it on shuffle. Press play. For every question type the song that's playing. When you go to a new question press the next button.
Songs I think are apropos get a (!), those not so, a (?)
-----
Opening Credits: KMFDM - Ultra (?)
Waking Up: Seal - Kiss From A Rose (?)
Falling In Love: Jamiroquai - Seven Days In Sunny June
Fight Scene: Nine Inch Nails - We're In This Together (!)
Breaking Up: K-Ci & JoJo - Crazy (!)
Getting Back Together: Eddie Money - Two Tickets To Paradise
Secret Love: Kanye West - All Falls Down (?)
Life's Okay: Peace Orchestra - Who Am I? (Animatrix Edit) (?)
Mental Breakdown: Counting Crows - Catapult (!)
Driving Flashback: Butthole Surfers - Whatever (I Had A Dream)
Partying: Foo Fighters - Times Like These
Happy Dance: Dr. Dre & 2pac - California Love
Regretting: Red Hot Chilli Peppers - She Looks To Me
Long Night Alone: Lifehouse - Breathing (!!)
Final Battle: Overseer - Doomsday
Death Scene: Insane Clown Posse - Pass Me By
End Credits: Lacuna Coil - Swamped (Acoustic) (!)
-----
So that settles it. WinAmp is connected to my brain in some kind of weird symbiotic relationship. | | comments: 6 comments or Leave a comment |
| "You kill yourself and you make a big old sacrifice and try to get your revenge. That all you're gonna end up with is a paragraph in a newspaper. In the end, it does nothing. Nothing changes. The world goes on and you're gone. The best revenge is to live on and prove yourself."
- Eddie Vedder | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Thefted from arca
4 Things You May Not Know About Me!
Four jobs I've had in my life:
1. Night-shift Shelf Stacker
2. Office Bitchboy
3. Directory Enquiries Assistant
4. Chalet Bedmaker
Four movies I would watch over and over:
1. Aliens
2. Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
3. Transformers The Movie
4. Collateral
Four places I have lived:
1. West St, Ryde
2. Argyll St, Ryde
3. Milligan Rd, Ryde
4. Student Accomodation, Bradford
Four TV shows I love to watch:
1. Lost
2. Have I Got News For You
3. QI
4. Whose Line?
Four places I have been on vacation:
1. California
2. Texas
3. Colorado
4. Oregon
Four of my favorite foods:
1. Pizza
2. Steak
3. Sour Candy
4. Salt & Vinegar Crisps
Something I would rather be doing right now:
1. Writing!
2. Writing?
3. Writing,
4. Writing.
Four things I always carry with me:
1. MP3 Player (NOT iPOD)
2. Wallet
3. Keys
4. Buddha
And a further 3 things you may not know!
Three things that scare me:
1. Confrontations
2. Spiders
3. Dentistry
Three people who make me laugh:
1. My dad (for reasons other than the obvious)
2. John Cleese
3. Billy Connelly
Three Things I love:
1. Music
2. Food
3. Writing
Three Things I hate:
1. Ignorance
2. Prejudice
3. The French
Three things I don't understand:
1. Women
2. Men
3. American Foreign Policy
Three things on my desk:
1. Xenical
2. Fluxx
3. Dice
Three things I'm doing right now:
1. Typing
2. Thinking
3. EATING NOODLES
Three things I want to do before I die:
1. Be published
2. Come to respect myself
3. Prove any one world religion to be false
Three things I can do:
1. Type at 100wpm
2. Do freaky things with my fingers
3. Sing along to three songs that are in a foreign language (none of which are Numa Numa!)
Three ways to describe my personality:
1. Introspective
2. Introverted
3. Warped
Three things I can't do:
1. See my toes
2. Accept Jesus into my heart
3. Resist food | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| 
Check it out. Shaved off the soupcatcher, now only got the goat. Opinions?
Edit: Now with Before option!
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